When my boys were ages seven, six and four; I began wanting to be a foster parent or adopt and I just knew that it would happen. I shared this insight with my husband and he practically laughed and gently tried to remind me there was a reason we stopped with three. Mind you this was a season when my OCD son was not diagnosed and struggling daily with his moods, I was stressed trying to home school and keep the house and run my in home childcare. But all I knew was, I desired to add more children to our mix and this desire was deep.
For years I kept this desire hidden in my heart and prayed for my husband to change his mind, but my husband was not in agreement and we didn’t even look into it. I fully believe before you choose to adopt both parents need to be completely on board. So after more than five years of pleading with God to change my husbands heart, I finally prayed, “God if this desire is not you please take it away!”
The next week after my heartfelt cry to the Lord, my husband tells me he desires to adopt. I had waited for years, and finally he was ready too. I was certain we would be adopting within months but no longer than a couple of years, because I had desired this for so long.
We started fund-raising and sharing our heart with others and then circumstances came smashing us in the face. A birth mother that offered me her child, shared ultrasound pictures with me and listened to me for hours share my dreams for him and knew that I was preparing my home had changed her mind upon seeing him. I was ready to fly out and get him and she called when he was three days old and says, “Don’t come, I can’t bear to give him up now”. Of course I understood her heart but I was crushed.
Then, the adoption agency we were ging through and spent some of our fundraising money on, closed. What was left of the fundraising, someone stole from us.
I was diagnosed with an illness, husband got a huge pay cut, we lost medical insurance and life seemed to get get crazier and crazier. But still the desire of adopting has never gone away.
I could easily say, “I am getting older it is time to put the dream to rest.” Or, ” My children are almost grown and I don’t want to start over now.”
But what I have learned through this experience is, sometimes desires and dreams do not happen overnight. Sometimes you are tried and tested and the season to harvest takes it’s time to reach.
It is important my friend to not get discouraged when you have something you know is on your heart for a reason. Rest in the fact that it will be achieved in the right timing. I have decided I will not give up on this dream. I will not be discouraged for I know that there is a specific, perfect time for everything to fall into place. There is a right season.
Challenge this day my friend: Do not allow the growing season to discourage you from your harvest. Do not give up hope of a dream because you have not seen your results yet. Mostly please, do not give into despair! If your heart begins to change, seek the Lord and make sure He is doing the changing instead of you giving up.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.
King James translation